Through the Lens of Wonder
I have an incredible friend who looks at everyone around him as a reflection of the Creator. It has shaped the way that I think about identity and helped me grow into myself.
I had been plagued with the feeling of being "too much" for as long as I can remember. In academic settings, I smooshed half of myself under a rock and knew that while the topics in front of me were interesting, they were not worth devoting my life to. My main interests are loving God and loving people.
In more spiritual circles, I found myself feeling like too much in a different way. Over the years, I've even lost clients who told me I didn't take the work seriously enough, or that I laughed too much.
I interpreted all of these experiences as evidence that something about me didn't quite fit. There always seemed to be a part of me that kept me from fully belonging in either world. I suppose growing up hearing voices others weren't hearing and knowing things others didn't know contributed to this feeling like an outsider, but we can file that away for another day.
My incredible friend looks at all pieces of identity and life path as deeply connected to the Creator. "Isn't it amazing, Chrysta, that God sent you to Princeton and you know so much stuff?" And, "Wow, Chrysta, you have a huge spiritual call. God made you special." He reflects on every experience, every turn in life as part of God's magnificent plan. I had a tremendous amount of shame about trying to shut my spiritual gifts down, and he helps me see how the journey of angst and uncertainty around my gifts helps me forge authenticity.
So I ask you today, gentle reader, to look at yourself through this lens of joy and wonder. You are intentionally created and deeply loved. There are no accidental parts of you. God has been present through every turn in your story, shaping you, guiding you, perhaps even demolishing old pieces of you. You are held in Perfect Love, today and always.
~c
This Week’s Reflection
“At its worst, it’s impatience. At its best, it’s persistence.”
Featured Photo by Violet
Several of you have fallen in love with our goat Fern. He is absolutely precious and deserves all the adoration. This is Fern's sweet mama Iris. She is a gentle, patient, and joyful mama, who just loves being around her babies and her people.